Whenever people ask me, in regards to fostering, “How is it ?”, I almost always give the same initial 3 word answer, “Hard but good.”
Hard because our lives and schedules have had to revolve around tons of appointments, therapies (and therapist’s schedules), visits, and meetings. Since saying YES to this sibling placement 8 weeks ago, we have had about 25 foster care related obligations. This includes 4 therapists in and out of our home during the weeks, multiple pediatrician appointments, appointments with various specialties for Little Man, meetings to coordinate care, meetings with case workers, and weekly visits with mom.
Hard because I’m more isolated due to the above and less time to go to playdates or see friends. Even when we do have a rare “free day” I’m hesitant to go on lots of outings like we used to because of the stress of taking 4 kids under 5 out by myself.
Hard because I have not had a full night of sleep in 8 weeks. And then have to be up and ready to hit the ground running to take care of everyone.
Hard because there is SO much unknown. I don’t know what next week will bring, certainly not next month, and 6 months from now who knows what life will look like.
Hardest because I have grown to love these 2 like my own. They have become a part of our family & it is beautiful…but hard. I have no say in their futures, no control over what happens next. The only comfort I have is in knowing that God has a plan for them, and that His plans are ALWAYS best.
…But It’s Good:
Good because I have met some amazing people through this journey. People I never would have met otherwise. Therapists who now feel almost like friends. Social Workers/Case Workers I’ve grown to admire SO much for their dedication and compassion despite being overworked and under appreciated. Other foster moms who share a common passion for this…this hard but good life.
Good because I wake up every day with a purpose. This may be slightly selfish but I live better on purpose…and this journey has given me so much DRIVE. I feel more alive. Even sleep-deprived, I have more of a zest for life.
Good because I get a front row seat in seeing the progress in these kids. As foster parents you see DAILY improvements and even the tiniest things make it feel worth it. I have gotten to see first smiles, first steps. To give first baths. To hear first words. And I get to celebrate first holidays (bittersweet).
Good because I witness my own children and husband sacrificing for and loving on children who desperately need it. The lessons learned from fostering I pray will carry with our children as they grow, lessons I could not have adequately taught them myself without this unique experience.
Good because I know this is where God wants us. At least for now. And there is so much peace in that.
So when you ask me how it is going…and I answer, “It’s HARD but GOOD,” this is why. And the longer I live and walk out this journey the more convinced I am that we are NOT called to EASY. Easy is not always good. We are called to sacrifice for others, and it is hard sometimes, but let me tell you, it is the key to happiness. An easy life can lead to monotony, it can hinder growth, and it can prevent you from experiencing all God has in store for your life.
What is holding you back from doing something HARD? Step out into the waters and experience the vibrancy of a life living on HIS terms. You won’t ever regret it.
1. We are traveling with 4 kids under 5 to Kansas for the holidays…so prayers for a safe and healthy trip & a car ride (10 hrs) that doesn’t leave us with nothing left when we get there.
2. Court is after Christmas– prayers that God’s will is done.
3. Little Man has a minor surgery coming up that will require an overnight at the hospital. Prayers for an easy recovery and no complications.
4. Prayers for Birth family during the holidays especially.
5. Prayers for our family, that God makes clear the path He has planned for us on this journey.
Have you ever thought about fostering? Do you have any questions or concerns ? I would love to connect with you…feel free to reach out in the comments section or through the “Contact Me” section. Also, to Follow the blog and receive email updates click “Menu” and “Follow Blog”.
HAVE A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!
God Bless You in 2019,
4 thoughts on ““Hard But Good.””
Wow you nailed it ! I am a foster mom of a 12 week old baby who was born drug addicted. We adopted his biological brother 6 years ago after fostering him . Everything you said is so true . I love that people like you out thisni for our for others to read. It makes me remember we are not alone and I’m sure it helps others decide if fostering is right for them . So thank you (:
Thank you for your sweet comment! And for fostering love to your 12 week old! You are making a huge difference in their lives (both of them!) … even when it’s super hard ! 😀❤️ I hope you have a very Merry Christmas 🎄!
Angela you just opened my heart and mind so much. Whom God calls he also equips! Now I know what to pray for during my daily devotion. Strength, more wisdom and rest. Please don’t hesitate if it’s something we can assist with if nothing more but conversation and prayer. We will be cheering from the sideline!
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Karl, thanks so much! Your support means a lot! Hope you & your family are well. I saw the clip of you, Michelle, & Mason on Deal or No Deal— how cool!! Congrats 😃